Wishi-wish-wish

I hate taking medicines. I have that new age belief that medicines make us weak, vulnerable even, to more reasons to be weak and vulnerable. I know that’s not true is it not? but we all have to hold on to something we can believe in. I’m a firm believer of false truths. How sometimes, these false realities become true—The Secret, I would say—sometimes, just plain delusional.

Next week shall be the start of a new chapter in my life, a chapter that I can only hope to write well, eloquently, elegantly and strong. I have always wanted to be a writer. Not for the by line nor the fame, should there be any. Definitely not for the money because knowing me, though I know I have the bone and spine to find pure joy in the simplest things, am easily attracted to glitter and the sparkles of life. Luxury is my middle name; but like most of us, that middle name isn’t quite necessary.

So next week will begin a new chapter of my life where each day shall be a make or break point, in its most literal sense. My responsible DNA hopes to satisfy with excellence; while my playful bone can only pray for pleasantries along the way. I hope it wouldn’t be a tireless cycle. I hope for growth and a steadfast movement towards something better. It’s almost mid-year and I’m closer my “moving out” deadline. However, today, I shall be thankful for movement.

From point A to B.

From Y to everlasting changes.

To highways and pitchforks.

Credits.

Cue music.

Here comes that little teaser at the end of a movie. That elusive five second spiel you didn’t think existed, a gift for the patient ones.

I own a Toshiba something laptop that is brutally butchered into a seemingly functional piece of metal. This would probably sound pointless, or maybe even shallow, but I’m kinda looking forward to using a new computer for work. I think I will be issued a laptop, it wouldn’t be mine to own, but still mine to use and bring home and stuff, I assume. Now, knowing my paranoid mind, I’m sure commuting with a laptop that I might be held liable for should it be lost or worse, stolen, wouldn’t settle quite nicely; but I’m actually excited to have a new laptop.

Let me tell you a little something about my Toshiba. It’s so odd, because I didn’t name my laptop, or if I did, didn’t take its nickname seriously. I got this laptop three years ago when my tito asked me to return home and help with the family business. I paid for this laptop for six months and come to think of it, is the second most expensive thing I ever bought with my own money (the first being my 60k camera which until now, I have no idea how to use, really haha). I got a Toshiba because for gadgets, I always believe Japan knows best. I also got a Toshiba because I remember S owning a white Toshiba. According to her, a Mac was too expensive and complicated to maintain. Well, who am I kidding? I got a Toshiba solely because S owned a Toshiba. End of story.

To date, this laptop has been the dearest thing to me. I know that may have sounded geeky, but I have written so many things with this laptop. Music and relationships aside, this laptop is the reason for the many little successes I have earned the past few years. This is the room I never had, my room of requirement. Every scratch on my Toshiba looks beautiful to me. I even have scotch tape over it’s track pad (?) because it’s so overused, the protective covering against static, I assume, has been completely erased out. It has a crack, not just a dent, on its side, and its battery life is almost non existent, but my god, this Toshiba is more than a laptop. It’s a SEAL. It’s an overworked soldier, tortured with years of almost 24/7 typing, multiple-almost-illegally-multiple windows, and excessive careless downloads—all of which were done without an anti-virus! But hey, it’s still alive and kicking. I am a bit sad to part with it, but I know I must save up for a new laptop. Should I be given a new laptop to work with thanks to my new job, I will be grateful that my Toshiba, though unnamed, will be earning its well-deserved rest. It’s been three years, but with my abuse and misuse, that’s three dog years for this Toshiba wonder.

With that, I hope my office issued laptop will be a Toshiba. I honestly can’t see myself using a Samsung (that will die on me), and I doubt an Acer or an HP will survive me as well. I think I can only live with a Toshiba, Sony or a Lenovo… but then again, any would do.

Still, I hope!

Of course if I end up having my own PC at my station, please disregard all the talk and stop at cue music.

Ahh... these simple almost mundane wishes make me, me.